A cat. Suggestions sought, sensible sadists preferred.

The Snark

Dumpster Fire of the Gods
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
11,044
So a kitten adopts us. I've already found the assorted pieces of 2 tokays and found it 'playing' with a mouse. The boss finds the thing endearing and is trying to train it. I figured I would go with the flow and try to do some training too... my way.

The modified mosquito zapper had limited if interesting effects on what the cathing is supposed to exercise it's claws on. IE the tires on the jeep and nothing else. I'm making a blow gun to augment this approach. I've already got a slingshot.

And then we have to have a litter box. The boss is extremely adamant about this. Something about our place being up to it's eyeballs hooded animated garden hoses. That one was easy. Got the thing used to using the litter box then after the boss left I cleaned and filled it with the things favorite dry cat food. It's neuroses level increased significantly.

Of course it has to have a cat bed. We have some of that fluffy white fibrous material they stuff sofas with. Again after the boss left I toss the thing into the refrigerator box half filled with that gunk. The pitiful meow sounds slowly, satisfyingly, sank to the bottom.

Any further suggestions?
 

mrbonzai211

Arachnobaron
Old Timer
Joined
Feb 6, 2007
Messages
534
You are a truly sick person and should be banned from this board. What is wrong with you dude?
 

pavel

Arachnobaron
Old Timer
Joined
Oct 18, 2008
Messages
390
For starters, quit being an ass.

The boss accepts your interests doesn't she? Accept hers. In any event, being an abusive jerk doesn't say much positive about you.







 

The Snark

Dumpster Fire of the Gods
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
11,044
We live in a recovering second growth rainforest suffering from riparian area and watershed damage and development encroachment. The wildlife of the area has adapted and appears to be in fragile but stable condition. Our property is being maintained as a preserve where the local fauna and flora can be observed unmolested.
Into this endangered system an alien predator is introduced that kills without necessity and would be unlikely to survive without artificial assistance from humans. Fauna depredation has been already been observed. Now the question is, how to act responsibly and engage in frontal lobes higher purpose of stewardship of an environment?

I don't deliberately harm animals or cause them unusual stress or abuse, but I am by hosting a malignant anomaly in their midst. What is the solution?

(It stepped on the bug zapper by accident which is now left on and hazardous on a irreplaceable piece of furniture. The blow gun and it's deadly paper pellets are only serving to amuse the darned thing. Slingshot is fires powder balls that startle but don't cause harm. The refrigerator box is now things favorite toy. It is serving to fluff the stuff up that had become compacted. I'm not going into details about the litter box. :)
 
Last edited:

BrettG

Arachnoprince
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 19, 2009
Messages
1,315
Your first post made my brain hurt...."Hooded animated garden hoses"??? What the hell are you talking about?
 

The Snark

Dumpster Fire of the Gods
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
11,044
BrettG-(hooded) animated garden hoses. Cobras. The ultimate anathema of felis domesticus. No cat can resist that hooded thing sticking up in the grass and swaying back and forth.

Silberrücken. Mind Games... May I request it be called a time delayed paraprosdokian?

On a serious note, the cat presents itself as a dilemma to me. I protect animals whenever possible, but I put animals in their natural environments first and foremost. Where the cat relies on us for food and protection, and provides both itself and me with entertainment (albeit borderline twisted and demented on both sides) I am faced with a paradox in that would I come to it's aid when it places itself in grave peril? Should I undertake measures to make our place safer for it at the expense of the local fauna? Or perhaps practice the more common approach prevalent in most of the modern civilized world that claims the lives of millions of kittens every year of putting it in a bag and tossing it in a river?
 

BobGrill

Arachnoprince
Old Timer
Joined
Jan 25, 2011
Messages
1,669
I don't care what kind of conditions you live under or where you come from. What you're doing is sick and you need to stop. At least have some common sense and don't post retarded crap like that on an animal related forum. Idiot.
 

Silberrücken

Arachnoangel
Joined
Feb 17, 2010
Messages
875
The Snark: You can call it what you like, it's still a mindgame. Hence the wordplay you chose, to ensure the ire of members here.

Simple solution to this. Did you not say there is a litterbox? Put it to its intended use. Did you not say you feed it also? Viola. Keep the cat inside.

BobGrill: Outright name-calling will get you banned from the forum. Other words can be used to "voice" your opinions.

Wordplay.

Go.
 

The Snark

Dumpster Fire of the Gods
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
11,044
My apologies to all who have feelings hurt. I humanely put the cat down a few minutes ago. It apparently followed it's mother out on the road and was ran over. Found badly mangled on the side of the road when I came home.
(Phenobarbital OD in case you are interested)
 
Top