Really need some help

I am on my first T, an a.avic. I've had her for about a year and a half now, and love her. (though not sure if it's a male or female)..
Anyways, I found a tumor on myself a few months ago, and it has been diagnosed as a deep tissue malignant sarcoma. I am currently going through radiation and chemo treatments and have been feeling horrible lately. I'm in pain, and am finding hard to care for her the way she deserves. I am in the northern NJ area, and while I don't want to see her go, I also know I am not doing right by her due to everything else I'm dealing with now. I do not want to sell her, because money isn't the important thing. What's important to me is she or he goes to a good home. Someone who has experience with tarantulas and can give her the life she deserves. I will also give you her enclosure too, as she has built a nifty little tube web that I don't think she wants to give up. I don't know if anyone can help me or if I'm even posting in the right place for this, but I will feel a whole lot better knowing that she's with someone that can give her the best life a T could have..and because of what's going on, I can't be selfish about wanting to keep her when I am not able to be on top of things like I should. Sorry for rambling on, but it's a bad situation all around, and I'm just hoping to make it a little bit better, at least for her. Please let me know if you can help. Thanks

Sorry to hear about the tumor......hope all turns out well ........and hope you can find someone in your area who can take the T

I would take her but I live in NC

So saddened to hear of your current predicament. I'm from the Philadelphia area, but I have training for work in Somerset, NJ on April 24th and 25th. I could scoop her up then if that's close to you. I'm currently caring for 35 tarantulas, including 7 of genus Avicularia, all healthy. I assure you she'll have a good home. I'd be glad to help. PM me if this will work for you.

I just read your story, serious business there. But, are you totally sure you need to get rid of the spider? I give my avics about 10 minutes of care a week - if that. I keep T's because they are such low maintenance pets. I am not in your shoes, but if a tarantula gives you a bit of happiness - consider keeping it. I get a little lift in my spirits whenever I think of my spiders and scorpions and fish and cat. My 2 cents, take care. P

telepatella said:

I just read your story, serious business there. But, are you totally sure you need to get rid of the spider? I give my avics about 10 minutes of care a week - if that. I keep T's because they are such low maintenance pets. I am not in your shoes, but if a tarantula gives you a bit of happiness - consider keeping it. I get a little lift in my spirits whenever I think of my spiders and scorpions and fish and cat. My 2 cents, take care. P

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+1... Not that most people here wouldn't jump at the chance to help you out, as I believe I speak for most everyone when offering our empathy. However, sometimes when you only have one T, an illusion of necessary care requirements is formed. In reality, they actually require so very little. In no way do I want to minimize how you feel, but try giving it some time. On the days you feel up to it, toss in a cricket, ill the water dish, gaze admiringly... DONE! In the end, its our morale that is so effective in helping the body heal itself. Your little treespider that you have come to love will likely be a great pick me up when you need it most.

That you're thinking of your spider's well being in your situation, shows great care and character. Get better soon, we need as many people like you in the world, as we can get.

Awhh, if only you said you could ship her to the Uk. I would gladly take her off you.. :/ Good luck with the tumor. Hopefully you find the right owner.

I'm going to agree with Wildenthusiast, this little T makes you happy and you need to keep things that are going to make YOU happy. Thinking of her needs is very kind of you but really Ts don't require that much time. They don't need to be walked or cuddled and they aren't that messy. If you really feel that finding her a new home would be the best for her and you then you need to go with what you think is best but if you smile and it makes your heart is happy when you look at her then I would keep her

I would definitely take her if I was in your area, but best of luck battling... Chemo is really hard on a person, and a reason to smile always helps. But if you feel she really needs a new home, I sure hope you find one suitable. Good luck, in finding a home, and in fighting.

I want to thank you all for your well wishes! It really made me smile to read them! I have PM'd the user Keith B, and hopefully she will soon have a great new home if he's still interested. I agree with you all about the minimal upkeep of one tarantula, but even little things are difficult for me now. When not getting treatments I'm usually in bed because I'm so nauseous or tired. And I don't want her to suffer if I'm sick for a few days and can't clean up her boluses out of her enclosure or if I'm out of crickets or dubias and can't drive to get her more and she has to wait for me to feel better so she can eat. It just isn't fair to her. She deserves a great life, and that's not something I can fully provide for her right now. Although I will miss her terribly, I can't let that cloud my judgement. If being with someone else will give her a better life than being with me right now, then I need to let her go be where she can thrive. I feel in my heart this is the right decision for her.

My family has a mutated gene that makes us incredibly susceptible to cancer, and while I haven't gone through what you're going through (yet), my mom has. I empathize with you. I wish you all the best.